New Year Trivia

"Auld Lang Syne" is sung at the stroke of midnight in almost every English-speaking country in the world to bring in the new year. At least partially written by Robert Burns in the 1700's, it was first published in 1796 after Burns' death. Early variations of the song were sung prior to 1700 and inspired Burns to produce the modern rendition. An old Scotch tune, "Auld Lang Syne" literally means "old long ago," or simply, "the good old days." Here are the lyrics:

Auld Lang Syne Should auld acquaintance be forgot and never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot and days of auld lang syne?
For auld Lang syne, my dear, for auld Lang syne,
We'll take a cup of kindness yet, for auld Lang syne.
Should auld acquaintance be forgot and never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot and days of auld Lang syne?
And here's a hand, my trusty friend and gie's a hand o' thine
We'll tak' a cup o' kindness yet for auld Lang syne

The celebration of the new year is the oldest of all holidays. It was first observed in ancient Babylon about 4000 years ago. In the years around 2000 BC, the Babylonian New Year began with the first New Moon (actually the first visible crescent) after the Vernal Equinox (first day of spring). The beginning of spring is a logical time to start a new year. After all, it is the season of rebirth, of planting new crops, and of blossoming. The Romans continued to observe the new year in late March, but their calendar was continually tampered with by various emperors so that the calendar soon became out of synchronization with the sun. In order to set the calendar right, the Roman senate, in 153 BC, declared January 1 to be the beginning of the new year. But tampering continued until Julius Caesar, in 46 BC, established what has come to be known as the Julian Calendar. It again established January 1 as the new year. But in order to synchronize the calendar with the sun, Caesar had to let the previous year drag on for 445 days. The first of January was dedicated by the Romans to their God of Gates and Doors, Janus. A very old Italian God, Janus has a distinctive artistic appearance in that he is commonly depicted with two faces ... one regarding what is behind and the other looking toward what lies ahead. Thus, Janus is representative of contemplation on the happenings of an old year while looking forward to the new.

Ancient Egyptians originally celebrated the New Year with the Feast of Opet around the middle of June, which was when the Nile River usually overflowed its banks. Consequently, people were unable to work and would be free to take part in the festivities. Statues of the God, Amon, together with effigies of his wife and son, would be taken by boat down the Nile from Karnak to Luxor, where the people would sing, dance and feast for a 24 days before transporting the statues back to the temple. Phoenicians and Persians proclaimed the beginning of the New Year on the Autumnal Equinox (September 22nd).

New Year's Baby

The tradition of using a baby to signify the new year was begun in Greece around 600 BC It was their tradition at that time to celebrate their god of wine, Dionysus, by parading a baby in a basket, representing the annual rebirth of that god as the spirit of fertility. Early Egyptians also used a baby as a symbol of rebirth. The use of an image of a baby with a New Years banner as a symbolic representation of the new year was brought to early America by the Germans. They had used the effigy since the fourteenth century. Other traditions of the season include the making of New Year's resolutions, which also dates back to the early Babylonians. Popular modern resolutions might include the promise to lose weight or quit smoking. The early Babylonian's most popular resolution was to return borrowed farm equipment.
The first rooftop celebration atop One Times Square, complete with a fireworks display, took place in 1904. The New York Times produced this event to inaugurate its new headquarters in Times Square and celebrate the renaming of Longacre Square to Times Square. The first Ball Lowering celebration atop One Times Square was held on December 31, 1907 and is now a worldwide symbol of the turn of the New Year, seen via satellite by more than one billion people each year. The original New Year's Eve Ball weighed 700 pounds and was 5 feet in diameter. It was made of iron and wood and was decorated with 100 25-watt light bulbs.

It was thought that one could affect the luck they would have throughout the coming year by what they did or ate on the first day of the year. For that reason, it has become common for folks to celebrate the first few minutes of a brand new year in the company of family and friends. Parties often last into the middle of the night after the ringing in of a new year. It was once believed that the first visitor on New Year's Day would bring either good luck or bad luck the rest of the year. Special New Year foods are also thought to bring luck. Many cultures believe that anything in the shape of a ring is good luck, because it symbolizes "coming full circle," completing a year's cycle. For that reason, the Dutch believe that eating donuts on New Year's Day will bring good fortune.

Many parts of the U.S. celebrate the new year by consuming black-eyed peas. These legumes are typically accompanied by either hog jowls or ham. Black-eyed peas and other legumes have been considered good luck in many cultures. The hog, and thus its meat, is considered lucky because it symbolizes prosperity. Cabbage is another "good luck" vegetable that is consumed on New Year's Day by many. Cabbage leaves are also considered a sign of prosperity, being representative of paper currency. In some regions, rice is a lucky food that is eaten on New Year's Day.

Pasko Trivia

The word "Christmas" means "Mass of Christ," later shortened to "Christ-Mass." The even shorter form "Xmas" - first used in Europe in the 1500s - is derived from the Greek alphabet, in which X is the first letter of Christ's name: Xristos, therefore "X-Mass."

Today we know that Christ was not born on the 25th of December. The date was chosen to coincide with the pagan Roman celebrations honouring Saturnus (the harvest god) and Mithras (the ancient god of light), a form of sun worship. These celebrations came on or just after the winter solstice, the shortest day of the year in the northern hemisphere, to announce that winter is not forever, that life continues, and an invitation to stay in good spirit.

Sablayers: Bilang 18

Patay tayo dyan!

"Unfriend"

"Unfriend" ang Oxford Word of the Year. Ano ba ibig sabihin nun?

Unfriend – verb – To remove someone as a ‘friend’ on a social networking site such as Facebook.

May mga nakalaban pa ang "unfriend" sa Word of the Year at heto sila:

Hashtag – a # [hash] sign added to a word or phrase that enables Twitter users to search for tweets (postings on the Twitter site) that contain similarly tagged items and view thematic sets.

Intexticated – distracted because texting on a cellphone while driving a vehicle.

Netbook – a small, very portable laptop computer with limited memory.

Paywall – a way of blocking access to a part of a website which is only available to paying subscribers.

Sexting – the sending of sexually explicit texts and pictures by cellphone.

Freemium – a business model in which some basic services are provided for free, with the aim of enticing users to pay for additional, premium features or content.

Funemployed – taking advantage of one’s newly unemployed status to have fun or pursue other interests.

Zombie bank – a financial institution whose liabilities are greater than its assets, but which continues to operate because of government support.

Ardi – (Ardipithecus ramidus) oldest known hominid, discovered in Ethiopia during the 1990s and announced to the public in 2009.

Birther – a conspiracy theorist who challenges President Obama’s birth certificate.

Choice mom – a person who chooses to be a single mother.

Death panel – a theoretical body that determines which patients deserve to live, when care is rationed.

Teabagger – a person, who protests President Obama’s tax policies and stimulus package, often through local demonstrations known as “Tea Party” protests (in allusion to the Boston Tea Party of 1773).

Brown state ­– a US state that does not have strict environmental regulations.

Green state – a US state that has strict environmental regulations.

Ecotown – a town built and run on eco-friendly principles.

Deleb – a dead celebrity.

Tramp stamp – a tattoo on the lower back, usually on a woman.

Crayola Trivia

More than 100 billion crayons have been produced so far. The first crayons consisted of a mixture of charcoal and oil. In the early 1900s, cousins Edwin Binney and Harold Smith developed a nontoxic wax crayon. Binney's wife, Alice, attached the French word for chalk, craie, with "ola," from oily, to form the Crayola brand name. Their first box of Crayola crayons were sold for a nickel in 1903.

The first Crayola crayons came in a box of eight colours: black, blue, brown, green, orange, purple, red and yellow. By 1957, 40 new colours were introduced. Today there are more than 120 crayon colours, including Atomic Tangerine, Blizzard Blue, Mango Tango, Outrageous Orange, Laser Lemon, Screamin' Green and Shocking Pink. Over 5 billion crayons are produced each year.

7 Last Words Bago Na-sisante sa Trabaho

1. "Bobo naman yang si boss eh."
2. "Walang kwenta ang kumpanyang ito."
3. "Ipo-promote kita basta lagi lang tayong mag-date."
4. "Kalokohan yang termination after 3 consecutive lates... Ako nga 4 lates na eh!"
5. "Ma-reimburse ko nga itong 100 dollars worth of chocolates sa business trip ko."
6. "Bukas ko na submit ito sir, tinatamad ako ngayon."
7. "Ano?! Nag chat ka ng bastos sa secretary ni boss?! Asawa nya yun ah!"

Sablayers: Bilang 17

Ganito na ang latest interior designs...

Noypi Ka Ba? (Vocabulary Naman)

1. You say "take out" instead of "to go."
2. You ask for "Colgate" instead of toothpaste.
3. You refer to refrigerator as "ref", "Frigidare." or "pridyider."
4. You say "kodakan" instead of take a picture.
5. You order 'McDonalds' or 'Jollibee' instead of hamburger, which you pronounce 'ham-boor-jer.'
6. You say 'Ha?' instead of 'what?'
7. You say 'Hoy!' to get someone's attention.
8. You answer when someone yells 'Hoy!'
9. You turn around when you hear 'pssst.'
10. You say "Cutex" instead of nail polish.
11. You say "for a while" instead of "please hold" on the telephone.
12. Your sneeze sounds like 'Ahh-ching' instead of 'Ahh-choo.'
13. You say 'Aray' instead of 'ouch.'
14. You make acronyms for phrases: "OA" = Overacting, "DOM" = Dirty Old Man...
15. You say "aircon" instead of "A/C" or airconditioner.
16. You say 'brown-out' instead of 'black-out.'
17. You say "Ay" or "Uy" instead of "oops."
18. You start with "actually" when you're trying to explain something.
19. You say "comfort room" instead of bathroom.
20. "Ano" and "di ba" regularly slip out during conversations.
21. You try hard to speak English and when you don't know what to say next, you say "you know..."
22. You change your accent according to the person you're talking to.
23. When someone's pregnant, you say "she's on the way."
24. You say "ayyss ---!" in kolehiyala accent to show any kind of extreme emotion. Example: "Ayyy, shheeett, nag-split na sila?" "Ayysss, shheeett, talaga?"
25. When somebody gives you a compliment, instead of saying thank you, you say "hindi naman."

Upuan: Gloc 9 at Zelle

Kayo po na naka upo,
Subukan nyo namang tumayo.
At baka matanaw, at baka matanaw na nyo
Ang tunay na kalagayan ko.

Ganito kasi yan eh...

Verse 1:

Tao po, nandyan po ba kayo sa loob ng
Malaking bahay at malawak na bakuran
Mataas na pader pinapaligiran
At naka pilang mga mamahaling sasakyan
Mga bantay na laging bulong ng bulong
Wala namang kasal pero marami ang naka barong
Lumakas man ang ulan ay walang butas ang bubong
Mga plato't kutsara na hindi kilala ang tutong
At ang kanin ay simputi ng gatas na nasa kahon
At kahit na hindi pasko sa lamesa ay may hamon
Ang sarap sigurong manirahan sa bahay na ganyan
Sabi pa nila ay dito mo rin matatagpuan
Ang tao na nagmamay-ari ng isang upuan
Na pag may pagkakatao'y pinag-aagawan
Kaya naman hindi niya pinakakawalan
Kung makikita ko lamang siya ay aking sisigawan

Chorus:
Kayo po na naka upo,
Subukan nyo namang tumayo.
At baka matanaw, at baka matanaw na nyo
Ang tunay na kalagayan ko.

Verse 2:

Mawalang galang na po
Sa taong naka upo,
Alam niyo bang pantakal ng bigas namin ay di puno
Ang ding-ding ng bahay namin ay pinagtagpi-tagping yero
Sa gabi ay sobrang init na tumutunaw ng yelo
Na di kayang bilhin upang ilagay sa inumin
Pinakulong tubig sa lumang takuring uling-uling
Gamit lang panggatong na inanod lamang sa istero
Na nagsisilbing kusina sa umaga'y aming banyo
Ang aking inay na may kayamanan isang kaldero
Na nagagamit kapag ang aking ama ay sumweldo
Pero kulang na kulang parin,
Ulam na tuyo't asin
Ang singkwenta pesos sa maghapo'y pagkakasyahin
Di ko alam kung talagang maraming harang
O mataas lang ang bakod
O nagbubulag-bulagan lamang po kayo
Kahit sa dami ng pero niyo
Walang doktor na makapag papalinaw ng mata niyo
Kaya...

Wag kang masyadong halata
Bato-bato sa langit
Ang matamaay wag magalit
O bato-bato bato sa langit
Ang matamaan ay
Wag masyadong halata
Wag kang masyadong halata
Hehey, (Wag kang masyadong halata)
(Wag kang masyadong halata)
Yeahhey...

Sablayers: Bilang 16

Patok na pang Facebook profile ito!

Kape Trivia

An espresso has less caffeine than a cup of coffee.

A cup of drip brewed coffee has about 115 milligrams of caffeine, an espresso (and percolated coffee) about 80mg, while instant coffee has about 65mg of caffeine. Decaffeinated coffee is not totally caffeine free, containing about 3mg of caffeine. A 8oz can of Coca-Cola has about 23mg of caffeine, Pepsi Cola 25mg, Mountain Dew 36mg, and TAB 31mg. Tea has about 40mg of caffeine, while an ounce of chocolate contains about 20mg.

The first Espresso machine was introduced in 1822 by the French, but it was the Italians who perfected and distributed it.

Bahay Kubo Ni Bagyong Ondoy

(Kantahin sa tono ng Bahay Kubo)

Bahay ko po, dami putik,
Ang pumasok doon,
Ay sari-sari.

Nilimas na karton,
Sirang medyas at damit,
Silya, basurang mapanghe.

Ondoy parusa,
Binura Marikina,
At saka meron pa,
Lubog din ang Edsa.

Montalban at Pasig,
Taytay at Cainta,
Sa paligid-ligid ay puno ng BAHA!

Sablayers: Bilang 15

...and here we have our Teacher Created Material section...

Mga Balitang Walang Saysay

* Good news, walang bad news.

* Tahanang walang hagdan, inakyat.

* Unanong madre, napagkamalang penguin.

* Bulag, nakapatay, nagdilim daw ang paningin.

* Tindera ng suka, tinoyo.

* Basurero, nagsampa ng kaso, ibinasura.

* Misis ng photographer, nakunan.

* Isang buntis nasaksak, bata nakaiwas.

* Unggoy bumabasa nito, napangiti! Hehehe.

Jacque Bermejo: Windang Na Pinay!

Hindi ko sigurado kung totoo ba o hoax lang itong Facebook capture na ito. Galing sa email. Sinubukan kong i-search si Jacque Bermejo sa FB pero yung pic na nakita ko dun eh mukha siyang halimaw sa edit na green sa mukha (kung siya nga yun). I-google mo lang madami ka na mababasa. Pati na yung "Official Statement" ng kapatid niya.

Wala tayo magagawa kung trip nya talaga yung ganun o na-impluwensyahan lang siya dahil sa pag singhot ng usok ng kumukulong langis sa Dubai. Sabi nga daw eh na-hack yung account. Ang nakaka-lungkot dito eh kung totoo nga ito. Alam mo naman tayong mga Pinoy, medyo sensitive sa ganyan. Lalo na ngayong galing tayo sa bagyo na humagupit sa Metro Manila. May kasabihan nga na kung wala kang sasabihing mabuti eh huwag mo na lang sabihin.

Magkahalong nakaka-tawa at nakaka-asar talaga ang Pinoy sa mga ganitong panahon ng kalamidad. May nagkwento nga sa akin nung na-stranded sila sa bus. May umakyat na vendor na nagtitinda ng Skyflakes. May nagtanong kung magkano at doble sa normal ang sinabi nyang presyo. Ang nakaka-asar dun, sinabi pa nung vendor na minsan lang daw mangyari yun dahil may baha. Syet. Nakuha pang mag-justify.

Kung tibay lang sa kalamidad eh bilib ako sa Pinoy. Yun lang, matibay din kunin ang pagkakataon maka-isa sa kapwa. Hay, nobody's perfect nga naman.

Sablayers: Bilang 14

Newsflash: Isang lalake, ginaya ang pelikulang "UP." Ayun, patay.

7 Last Words Bago Nadulas

1. Ano ito, balat ng saging?
2. Wala yan. Tubig lang yan sa daan.
3. Maputik ata dito...
4. Wow! Bagong floor wax!
5. Eto ang tinatawag na lumot sa bato...
6. Tignan mo oh, ang kinis ng tiles.
7. Naka-apak ata ako ng sabon...

Noypi Ka Ba? (Mga Gawi at Ugali)

Mga mannerism at traits daw ng Pinoy.

1. Tumuturo ka gamit ang iyong labi.
2. Nagkakamay ka kung kumain at naka-taas ang iyong paa sa upuan at naka-lapat ang siko mo sa tuhod.
3. May bagahe kang "Balikbayan Box."
4. Tumatango ka pataas para batiin ang ibang tao.
5. Sumusutsot ka para makuha ang atensyon ng iba. Pssst!
   
6. Gumagamit ka ng batong panghilod ng libag tuwing naliligo.
7. Nagne-nenok ka mga anik-anik sa mga hotel o restaurant para gawing souvenir.
8. Napapa-ngiti sa ng walang dahilan (lalo na kapag nagte-text).
9. Humihingi ka ng tawad o discount sa Department Store.
10. Kumakamot ka ng ulo kapag hinde mo alam ang sagot sa tanong.
11. May kapirasong pagkain na tinitira ka sa hapag-kainan at nagkakahiyaan na kainin yun.
12. Naglalaro ka ng pusoy, mahjong, o tong-its.
13. Mas gusto mong nasa silong kesa ilalim ng araw dahil ayaw mong umitim.
14. Sadya mong may dagdag na "H" sa iyong pangalan: Jhun, Bhoy, Rhon.
15. Nilalagay mo sa harap mo ang iyong mga kamay at nagsasabing "Excuse, Excuse" kapag dumadaan ka sa gitna ng mga tao.
16. Gusto mo lahat ay imported or "stateside".
17. Lagi kang 15-30 minuto na late (meetings, events).
18. Lagi kang nag-aalok ng pagkain sa mga bisita.
19. Nagse-senyas ka ng parisukat sa hangin kapag kinukuha mo na ang chit (bill-out).
20. Hindi ka umuupo sa mga bowl ng public toilets. Magi-squat ka o palibutan ng tissue ang upuan ng bowl at magpa-flush ka gamit ang paa.
21. Kapag late ka pumasok sa trabaho, ang excuse mo ay "traffic eh."
22. Lagi kang nagsisipilyo pagkatapos kumain ng lunch sa opisina.
23. Nagbebenta ka ng Amway, Avon, Dakki, at Herbalife bilang sideline.
24. Kapag kukuha ng sedula, hinde mo nilalagay ang totoo mong sweldo. Minsan, pang-estudyante na bayad lang .
25. Sa Immigration, kapag may tinawag na "Maria", ikaw at 46 pang mga babae ang tatayo.
26. Sa tingin mo ay pareho lang ang mag-shower at maligo.
27. Ginagawa mong supot ng basura ang mga shopping bags o plastic bags ng supermarket.
28. Gumagamit ka ng baretang sabon kapag naghuhugas ng mga pinagkainan.
29. Ginagamit mong notebook cover ang mga imported fashion magazine at ayaw mo na artistang pinoy ang cover kase "jologs."
30. Enjoy ka manood ng Pinoy action films na laging ganito ang tema:

- Magkalabang mortal ang Bida at Kontrabida.
- Papatayin ng Kontrabida ang pamilya ng Bida.
- Maghihiganti ang Bida.
- Makikila ng Bida ang Leading Lady sa bar o resto at mai-inlab sila sa isa't-isa.
- Kikidnapin ng Kontrabida si Leading Lady at tatakutin si Bida na tigilan na siya pati goons nya.
- Sasagipin ng Bida ang Leading Lady (maaksyon na dito).
- Sa pagtakas gagamit ang Bida at Kontrabida ng mga lumang kotse. Maghahabulan.
- Sasabog ang mga lumang kotse at uulit-ulitin ito pero minsan ibang anggulo ng camera.
- Mapapatay ng Bida si Kontrabida at dadating ang mga pulis.
- Bida at Leading Lady ay mabubuhay ng happily ever after.

Sablayers: Bilang 13

Natural rock formations...

Condominium (Condom + Imodium)

Iba na din talaga ang panahon ngayon. Sa TV commercials pa lang, makikita mo na ang pagbubukas-isip ng mga tao sa mga bagay-bagay. Isa na dito ang mga commercials ng condom. Dati patago ito bilhin o ipagtanong sa drugstore. Ngayon, parang kendi na lang sa tindahan.

Naalala ko tuloy nung high school student pa ako. Ako ang madalas utusan ng nanay ko sa Mercury Drug sa Kalentong. Hinde pa supermarket ang style ng drugstores noon kaya lahat ng bibilhin mo eh aasikasuhin ng Pharmacy Assistant. May nakasabay akong malaking mama sa kaliwa na bumili ng Biogesic sabay parang pabulong na nagsabi ng condom. Mabilis namang kumilos para kumuha ng gamot yung babaeng Pharmacy Assistant na umasikaso sa kanya. Malamang condom lang talaga ang bibilhin nung mama pero umi-style lang ng Biogesic para hinde nakakahiya. Lusot na sana siya kaso sumigaw yung Pharmacy Assistant sa payment counter na nasa gitna ng drugstore. "Sir, ilan po uli yung Imodium?" Hehehe. Tatawa-tawa ako sa isip. Nakikiramdam. Mali yata ang dinig nung Pharmacy Assistant. Imbes na condom eh, Imodium. Hinde maka-imik yung mama. Gusto nyang sabihin ang salitang "condom" pero hindi nya malaman kung paano ito sasabihin. Maririnig ng lahat kasi nga nasa gitna ng drugstore yung payment counter. Gusto nyang sumigaw ng pabulong... "Condom!"

Sumigaw ulit yung Pharmacy Assistant na medyo na-weirduhan dahil sa hindi pag-imik nung mama kahit na nakatingin na ito sa kanya. "Sir, ilan po uli yung Imodium?!" Paulit na sinabi nung Pharmacy Assistant. Medyo mas malakas sa dati. Hehehe. Tumatawa na ako ng malakas sa isipan ngayon (at nagmumukhang tanga na din). Umubo ng konti at nagsalita na din yung mama. "Condom!" Narinig kong tumawa bahagya ang mga tao sa paligid nung mama at napangiti din yung babaeng Cashier. Pero hindi masyadong nahiya yung mama. May composure. Madalas na talaga siguro ito bumili nun. Hahaha! Tawa na naman sa isip. (Dito nagmukha na talaga akong tanga dahil naka-ngisi ako na parang aso).

Wala na ulit akong na-experience na ganun sa Mercury Drug. Kung nung panahon na yun eh talagang nakakahiya bumili ng condom, kabaliktaran na ngayon. At fancy pa nga dahil may iba't-ibang kulay pa at "flavor." Pero hindi pa din daw para sa lahat ang condom. Tignan mo yung mga commercials. May singsing yung lalake di ba? Pahiwatig na may may asawa na siya. Ahm, yun lang hinde ko napansin kung may singsing din yung babae na kasama niya. O talaga bang asawa niya yun. Hehehe. Wala lang. Nilagyan ko lang ng kulay. So... Are we good?!

Sablayers: Bilang 12

Lady Gaga: Sa, sa, sa-Sucker Face, sa sa-Sucker Face!

Bahagharing Mundo

Ang paligid mo'y pagmasdan.
Ang bawat tao'y iyong tignan.
Hindi ba't ating masasabi,
Ang mundo'y bahaghari lamang?

Isang hugis ngunit makulay.
Hindi ba't ganyan ang ating buhay?
Sa dulo'y may ginto't kayamanan,
Pinipilit maabot kamay.

Ang bawat kulay at bawat tingkad.
Ikaw at ako'y dyan nakasaad.
Buksan ang puso't iyong pakinggan.
Si bahaghari ang maglalahad.

Isang bahaghari ang mundo nating ito.
Mahaba't malawak minsa'y ibang anyo.
Kung magmumuni't iyong iisipin,
Sadyang ganyan ang buhay ng tao.

Iba't ibang kulay ngunit iisa.
Iba't ibang kulay ngunit sama-sama.
Minsa'y malungkot, minsa'y masaya.
Minsa'y mahirap, minsa'y maginhawa.

May tuwang dala sa puso mo,
Ang pagbasbas ng Diyos sa bawat tao.
Isang karangalan ang mapili at mailagay,
Dito sa Kanyang bahagharing mundo.

Sablayers: Bilang 11

"Kaya pala mamahalin ang Mac. Magaganda nakikita eh!"

Ang Nokia Na Laptop

Heto ang Nokia na hindi tao, hindi hayop, at hindi cellphone. Astig yung advertisement pati tugtog. Wala lang.

Sablayers: Bilang 10

Ganda ng Lola mo!

Pagbabago

Sa isang mundo na puro kahibangan,
Iyong gawin ang dapat, gawin ang kailangan.
Huwag kang matakot at huwag susuko,
Ang pagbabago'y atin ding matutungo.

Pagbabago - ayusin ang lipunan.
Alisin ang inggit at ang kasakiman.
Magbigay - Taos sa puso at tunay.
Ugaling makatao gawing ating gabay.

Bihisan ang puso at ang isipan.
Imulat ang mga mata sa kapaligiran.
Huwag puro salita at kumilos ka rin.
Upang ang pagbabago'y agad nating marating.

Sama-sama tayo sa ating adhikain.
Kasama ang Diyos na siyang Ama natin.
Iisa ang pwersa, iisa ang lakas.
Tungo sa isang maaliwalas na bukas.

Sablayers: Bilang 9

Beach Girl 1: Pssst huuy!... Catch!
Beach Girl 2: Ano kamo? Catch?!! (oomph)

More Trivia Atbp.

...at mga iba pang trivia...

The “french” in french fries actually describes the way the spuds are sliced, not their country of origin. (ah, ok)

One cup of cooked sweet potatoes provides 30 mg (50,000 IU) of Beta-Carotene (Vitamin A). It would take 23 cups of broccoli to provide the same amount. (ano daw?!)

The dot on top of the letter "i" is called a "tittle." Tittle is Latin for something very small. (ang liit naman ng tittle mo...)

Strawberries have more Vitamin-C compared to oranges. (go baguio!)

Pandan leaves or a Pandan plant is a useful repellant for pests such as cockroaches. Just put the leaves or the plant in a place where cockroaches lurk around. (at pagkatapos gamitin mo sa sinaing!)

In Microsoft Windows operating systems you cannot create a folder named "con" (without the ""). (wow, totoo ah!)

12% of Americans think that Noah's Ark and Joan of Arc are related.

The name of all the continents end with the same letter that they start with.

Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.

The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called "aglets."

A duck's quack doesn't echo and no one knows why.

WD-40 literally stands for water displacement 40th attempt. That's the name straight out of the lab book used by the chemist who helped develop WD-40 back in 1953. Norm Larsen, was attempting to concoct a formula to prevent corrosion, a task which is done by displacing water. Norm's persistence paid off when he perfected the formula for WD-40 on his 40th try.

A cough releases an explosive charge of air that moves at speeds up to 60 mph.

A fetus acquires fingerprints at the age of three months.

A sneeze can exceed the speed of 100 mph.

Babies are born with 300 bones, but by adulthood we have only 206 in our bodies. (plus osteoporosis)

Beards are the fastest growing hairs on the human body. If the average man never trimmed his beard, it would grow to nearly 30 feet long in his lifetime.

Most men have erections every hour to hour and a half during sleep. (un, flag ceremony...)

On average, women say 7,000 words per day. Men manage just over 2000. (blah, blah, blah)

Land crabs found in Cuba can run faster than a horse. (matignan nga sa dividendaso)

2 out of 200 people we see each day are ghosts. (puuteek! meh ganon?!)

Bald men actually have a stronger sex drive than their non-balding counterparts. Balding is influenced by high levels of testosterone, which is also responsible for the sex drive. (sex machine na taong roll-on?)

Dogs sweat through their tongue.

The two lines that connect your top lip to the bottom of your nose are known as the philtrum.

Laughing lowers levels of stress hormones and strengthens the immune system. Six-year-olds laugh an average of 300 times a day. Adults only laugh 15 to 100 times a day. (hahaha! 300x)

Sablayers: Bilang 8

Tsk, tsk. Sabi ko na eh. Sa wetpaks talaga lumalabas ang web ni Spider-Man!

Surprising Trivia

Mga bagay-bagay na trivia... Pinadala sa email ng pinsan ko sa States... Kuha na ng tissue at baka dumugo ilong nyo...

They used to use urine to tan animal skins, so families used to all pee in a pot & then once a day it was taken & sold to the tannery... If you had to do this to survive you were "Piss Poor". But worse than that were the really poor folk who couldn't even afford to buy a pot... they "Didn't have a pot to piss in" & were the lowest of the low.

The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature isn't just how you like it , think about how things used to be. Here are some facts about the 1500s:

Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and they still smelled pretty good by June. However, since they were starting to smell, brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor. Hence, the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting married.

Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it. Hence the saying, "Don't throw the baby out with the bath water!"

Houses had thatched roofs-thick straw-piled high, with no wood underneath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the cats and other small animals (mice, bugs) lived in the roof. When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall off the roof. Hence the saying "It's raining cats and dogs."

There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house. This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings could mess up your nice clean bed. Hence, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection. That's how canopy beds came into existence.

The floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had something other than dirt. Hence the saying, "Dirt poor." The wealthy had slate floors that would get slippery in the winter when wet, so they spread thresh (straw) on floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping outside. A piece of wood was placed in the entrance-way. Hence: a thresh hold.

In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire. Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start over the next day. Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while. Hence the rhyme: Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old.

Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special. When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off. It was a sign of wealth that a man could, "bring home the bacon." They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around and chew the fat.

Those with money had plates made of pewter. Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning death. This happened most often with tomatoes, so for the next 400 years, or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.

Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or the upper crust.

Lead cups were used to drink ale or whiskey. The combination would sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days. Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial. They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up. Hence the custom of holding a wake.

England is old and small and the local folks started running out of places to bury people. So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house, and reuse the grave. When re-opening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside and they realized they had been burying people alive. So they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the graveyard shift) to listen for the bell; thus, someone could be, "Saved by the bell" or was considered a "Dead ringer".

Sablayers: Bilang 7

Pangalan ba ng Cashier o Kasarian?!! Meh ganooon??!!

Noypi Jokes: Issue 2

Mabuti pa i-share ko na lang dito ang mga text jokes na nakukuha ko. Minsan walang load ei. At least mas maraming tao maabot nito. Di ba?! (pinilit ma-justify) =)

THE RING

Recently, a man had 2 go 2 da hospital 2 have his wedding ring cut off from his penis bcoz his GF found the ring in his pant's pocket & got so mad, she stuck it on him while he was asleep.

Which is worse?...

1. Having your GF find out that ur married?

2. Explaining 2 ur wife how ur wedding ring got on ur penis?

3. Or finding out ur penis fits through ur ring?

Bulilit! Bulilit!... Ang liit-liit!... Hahaha.


HAYOP GILAGID

Q: Anung hayop ang walang gilagid?
A: EH di ANT!

Q: Bkt?!
A: kc LANG-GUM eh.


MILITARY TIME

Doc: Lola, kelan ho ba kayo last na nakipag-sex?
Lola: Mga 1955.

Doc: Matagal na ho pala ano?
Lola: (tumingin sa relo nya)...

Lola: Di naman! 20:55 pa lang eh.


NAGING ASO

BAKLA at MACHO nagkasabay sa CR...

Bakla: Ang laki naman nyang sayo.
Macho: Wala na tong silbi kasi iniwan na ako ng GF ko.

Macho: Mabuti pa, puputulin ko na lang ito at ipapakain sa aso.
Bakla: Aw, aw , aw! Arf arf!


BOYS OVER FLOWERS

Girl: Bkt niu ba kmi pinagpapalit sa DOTA.
Boy: Eh kc naman, pinagpapalit nyo kami sa Boys Over Flowers! Pakyu Jun Pyo, Pakyu!

Hahaha...


KAHIT WALANG LAMAN

Dati, ang gamot sa sakit na love-nat ay kiss-pirin at yakap-sule.

Ngaun nde na uso yun...

Ano na uso?...

BiogeSEX!!!

Pwedeng gawin kahit walang laman ang tyan. Ingats!

Sablayers: Bilang 6

Patay tayo jan!

A Lab Story Ng Usong Kanta

One day Lady Gaga met Boy Gagu.

Since then, Boy Gagu was always following Lady Gaga wherever she goes like a PAPARAZZI.
Lady Gaga got mad because of this so she always stares at Boy Gagu with a POKER FACE.

"Why are you always following me?" said Lady Gaga.
"Because I love you." said Boy Gagu.

Lady Gaga said "How can you love me when you are also chasing the WONDER GIRLS?"
Boy Gagu replied "They are only my friends. There is NOBODY, NO-NOBODY BUT YOU!"

Lady Gaga was touched when she heard this and gave Boy Gagu a big hug.

As a symbol of his love, Boy Gagu gave Lady Gaga a PUSSY CAT DOLL.

And they lived happily ever after. JAI HO.

Katangahan Sa Pader

"May tatlong tanga, pang-apat yung nagbasa."

Mga salitang naka-sulat sa isang pader ng ginuguhong building sa Eastwood. Nabasa nyo ba? Ako hinde.

Sablayers: Bilang 5

Ang tunay na 40x optical zoom.

Gusto Mo Po Cake?

I love cakes. Kahit noong bata pa ako. Ewan. Masarap eh. Sa Birthday, sa Pasko, sa Bagong Taon, Valentines Day, Mother's Day, Father's Day, o kahit pang meryenda lang, iba ang dating sa akin kapag may cake. Pakiramdam ko laging meron espesyal, di ba?

Ang ayaw ko ay yung binalahurang cake. Yung parang walang kabuhay-buhay. Yung itsurang tinapay lang na nilagayan ng Nestle Cream, whip cream, o icing na mukhang merengue. Yung tuyot o puro tamis lang. Bad yun. Sabihin mo man na maarte ako, eh yun ang dahilan kung bakit hinde ko ma-tripan yung cake na tinitinda sa bakery. Walang basagan ng trip.

Ayaw ko talaga ng binalahurang cake. Kapag bumibili ako ng cake sa mga branded bakeshops katulad ng Red Ribbon o Goldilocks, tinitignan ko kung sino ang mas may malufet na cake offering. Pansin ko na mas angat na ang mga Red Ribbon cakes ngayon kumpara sa Golilocks. Sa Black Forest cake pa lang ng dalawa, mas malinam-nam ang Red Ribbon sa hitsura at sa lasa. Ewan ko ba kung ano na nangyari sa mga cakes ng Goldilocks. Lumaki ako sa Goldilocks pero hindi naman ganun ang mga cake nila noon. Sila pa nga ang 1st choice ng pamilya kapag cake na ang pinag-uusapan eh.

Baking a cake is an art. And we appreciate art, in one way or another, kahit painting pa yan, drowing, o sculpture. Sana naman hinde pa nawawalan ng art ang Goldi.

So, kanino ka?... Red Ribbon o Goldilocks?...

Ako iba ang tanong ko sa isip ko eh... Ano ba sa tagalog ang cake?

Sablayers: Bilang 4

Lady Golfer: Looks like I made a birdie...

Noypi Jokes: Issue 1

SA MENTAL HOSPITAL
(1 baliw nagbubungkal ng lupa para magtanim)

BALIW: Magtatanim akooooo, magtatanim akoooooo. (Clap clap clap)
NURSE: Anong ginagawa mo?

BALIW: Magtatanim baket?
NURSE: Pano ka magtatanim eh wala ka namang mga seeds na itatanim? Baliw ka talaga! Pumasok ka na nga sa loob! Buset.

BALIW: Eh kaw pala sira ulo eh!.. Seedless ito! Seedless! Leche.
----------

ROCK BAND

TELE: Ano bang hinahanap mo dyan sa 3-in-1 coffee mo at kanina ka pa silip nang silip dyan?
TABIS: Hinahanap ko yung libreng asukal! May nakasulat kasi na "Sugarfree."
TELE: Bobo! Banda kaya yun!
----------

SA DELIVERY ROOM

DOC: Kambal anak mo. Sister mo nagbigay ng names.
INA: Naku, eh tanga un Doc. Ano pinangalan sa mga anak ko?
DOC: Sa girl, DENICE.
INA: Aba, ok un ah! Eh dun sa boy?
DOC: DENEPHEW...
INA: Buset!
----------

THE KURIPOT

>> Mrs. Tanoy is a very kuripot woman.

>> When her husband died, she inquired with the newspaper asking the price for the obituary.

>> The Ad Taker said: "300 pesos for 5 words."

>> She said: "Pwede ba 2 words lang? "Tanoy dead."

>> Ad Taker: "No ma'am. 5 words is the minimum."

>> After thinking for a while, Mrs. Tanoy said to the Ad Taker:

>> Ok, para sulit, ilagay mo, "TANOY DEAD. HONDA FOR SALE. "
----------

UR BOTH

“Am I pretty or ugly?” Tanong ng naglalambing Misis sa kanyang Mister.

“BOTH.” Sagot ng Mister.

“Ano ang ibig mong sabihin na BOTH?”

“Ang ibig kong sabihin, you’re pretty ugly.”
----------

MALE FANTASY OF A FEMALE BY AGE

Age 17 – Tall, Dark and Handsome
Age 25 – Tall, Dark and Handsome with Money
Age 35 – Tall, Dark and Handsome with Money and a Brain
Age 48 – a Man with Hair
Age 66 – a Man
----------

TUNNEL OF LOVE

Magkasintahan nag-uusap habang nakasakay silasa isang tren na naglilibot sa ibat-Ibang States sa Amerika...

LALAKE: “Kung alam ko lang napakahaba noong tunnel na dinaanan nati kanina, eh di sana hinalikan kita.” BABAE (nagtataka): “Ibig mong sabihin hindi ikaw yung kahalikan ko kanina??”
----------

SEA MANLOLOKO

GF: Niloloko mo ako!

BF: Ha? Bakit?

GF: Nakita kita sa SM, may kasamang iba!

BF: Tumigil ka! Di kita niloloko. Yung kasama ko sa SM ang niloloko ko!

GF: Ah, akala ko ako eh. Sori na. Loveyou!
----------

Sablayers: Bilang 3

Biker: No helmet rule pala huh!

Opis Windang

(emailed from a friend)

ANO KAYA KUNG...

Ang lobby guard niyo ay si Palito alias Rambuto.

Ang time administrator niyo ay si Cherie Gil at ang morning greeting niya with a smile ay..."Welcome to hell..."

Ang HR head niyo ay si Bella Flores at ang Employee Relations Officer ay si Odette Khan at ang HR Staffing head ay si Dexter Doria... At pag pumasok ka na walang ID o hindi naka-uniform... kakaladkarin ka nila sa buhok palabas ng opisina pagkatapos kang pagsasampalin.

Ang Employee Benefits head ay si Lolit Solis...Cge... magreklamo ka na maliit ang sweldo mo... Cgeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee... I dare you!!!!

Tuwing may problema ang kompanya, ang Corporate Communications head niyo na si Cristy Fermin ang nagbibigay ng official company statement... At ang simula nang kanyang presscon ay... "Galing ito sa isang reliable source at itataya ko ang buhay at karangalan ko dito... Wala akong libel case na inuurungan..."

Ang official company driver niyo ay si Vandolph. Do I have to explain?

Kapag kasama mo mag-OT si German Moreno... Walang tulugan!

Ang Legal Investigator niyo ay si Tony Falcon at ang assistant niya ay si Wengweng... Paminsan minsan ay tumutulong si Ricky Lo at Madam Auring bilang consultant.

Tuwing bubuksan mo ang filing cabinet andun si Mahal sa loob para iabot ang file na hinahanap mo.

Messenger niyo si Kuya Cesar.

Si Boy Abunda ang career counselor mo at tuwing me problema ka ang tanong niya ay... "Mag-usap tayo kaibigan... Kung nasa harap ka ng salamin ano ang sasabihin mo sa iyong sarili?"

Si Love Añover ang voice behind your automated phone system. "Mga katsokaran... ip you chuva da number
eklavu... dependots 1... ips not... luz valdez... charing!"

Ang Office Security niyo ay binubuo ng Tulfo Brothers... Bigla silang darating sa opisina mo at sasabihin "Hephephep... Nag-uuwi ka ng bond paper... Tarantadong to ah... Manggagantsong butete ka!!!" At pag tumanggi ka... Ipapanood nila sa yo ang hidden camera shots na nagpupuslit ka ng 2 pirasong bond paper mula sa printer... Habang pinoposasan ka ng mga pulis.

Tuwing pasko ang prize committee head ay si Bernadette Sembrano at Vicky Morales. Taun-taon din ay nanalo ko ng banana-cue at pedicab showcase. At nangangarap ka na sana next time si Willie naman para me jeepney.

Si Michael Fajatin ang laging nagpe-present ng annual report niyo..."Mga Igan... Nung umabot sa PhP50M ang
ating kinita... Kumita tayo ng PhP50M... Matapos nating magtrabaho ng matindi kumita tayo ng PhP50M pero bago yan ay nagtrabaho muna tayo saka tayo kumita ng PhP50M."

Boss mo si Big Brother... At alam niya na lampas 15 minutes ka nag-coffee break kaya kailangan mo mag-type nang gamit ang ilong mo hanggang patawarin ka niya.

Kaopisina mo si Arnold Clavio at pag naka-leave siya... OIC niya si Arn-Arn.

At ang number 1 sign na you're in Opis Windang... Department Head mo si Mike Enriquez... AT HINDI NIYA KAYO TATANTANAN!!!!

Sablayers: Bilang 2

Janitor: Ano po gagawin nyo kung ako ikaw?...

Game & Watch: Balik-tanaw

Kung sino ang kayang maka-reset ng score sa zero, siya ang pinaka-malupet. Pataasan ng score ang labanan palagi. Kailangan wala o konti lang ang miss. Walang patayan ng unit maipakita lang ang highest score sa mga kaklase. Binabaliktad ang isang baterya para hinde agad maubos. Ito ang mundo ko nung nauso ang Nintendo Game and Watch.

Naka-regalo ako nito nung birthday ko noon. Proud owner. Hindi lahat ng mga bata noon ay meron nito. Naalala ko pa kung paano ko yun inalagaan. Maingat ako na hindi mahiram ng kalaro ko na madiin kung pumindot (hehehe). Ako ang master ng Parachute game at kaya ko i-reset ang score sa zero na walang miss. Taob lahat ng ibang bata sa akin sa larong Parachute. Pina-panis ko silang lahat. =)

Sobrang love ko yung Game and Watch. Naka-subok na ako dati ng ibat-ibang laro dun sa mamang nagpapa-renta ng mga Game and Watch (na nakatali sa kahoy) pero iba pa din ang dating ng Parachute sa akin. At kahit pa lumabas na ang high-end Donkey Kong na dual-screen, hinde ko pa din ipinagpalit si Parachute ko. Mas madami pang oras ang inilaro ko sa Game and Watch noon kesa sa PSP ko ngayon.

Yun lang, nung naubos na ang baterya, hinde ako nagpabili agad dahil umandar ang aking pagka-Engineer. Dahil 3Volts ang nakita kong voltage na kailangan nya, nilagayan ko siya ng 3Volts gamit ang isang AC-DC adaptor. Umandar syempre pero hinde na uli nabuhay pagkatapos nun (pakialamero kase!). Wish ko nga sana hinde ko din naitapon yun kahit sira na. Legacy collection din yun sa ngayon.

Siguro yung Nintendo Game and Watch ang nagbukas ng pintuan ko sa pagka-hilig ko sa gadgets. Mananatili itong isnag malufet na parte ng aking kabataan.

Sablayers: Bilang 1

Engineer at McDo Eastwood, 8PM.